How to fly fish and not make us all look bad


  • Stop holding that rod butt in your teeth - you look like an idiot (And yes, balancing it on your shoulders is pretty lame too)
  • Fly fishing is not an extreme sport - if you somehow think it is, you need to get a life or get out more (probably both)
  • Welded loops are for little kids - learn to tie a nail knot.
  • Loose that ‘grin n grip’ - Holding your fish out at the camera is just a projection of your extremely small penis.
  • Pictures of fish in the water are extremely  cool.
  • Nothing will make you look like more of a doofus than being all gear and no cast. Work on your fly casting - it will do more for your fly fishing than anything else you could do.
  • Stop being a tight arse and buy some decent gear - start at the pointy end and work back.
  • A stiff rod will not make you a better caster.
  • An expensive rod will not make you a better caster.
  • My fly line will not make you a better caster.
  • A lesson will make you a better caster.
  • My DVD’s will make you a better caster.
  • Practice will make you a better caster.
  • A Gin and Tonic will make you a better caster.
  • Fast and stiff describe two different things - learn ‘em.
  • Understand what a weight forward line is and that it is ABSOLUTELY USELESS for casting distance.
  • "Todays modern fast action rods” Do not need a line that is half a line weight heavier in order to load.
  • The correct advertising blurb for “weight and a half lines” should be “Buy this line, it will make you seem like a better caster than you actually are”
  • Be aware that weight and a half lines are for little kids. You’re a big kid and are being fed marketing crap - you’re better than that.
  • Everything has ether been done, written about, tried or discounted as a stupid idea by someone else already - but hey, give it a go anyhow.


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